Myoung Jae surprised me the other day when he came into the office bearing the following tidings: “You have a letter waiting for you in the office.”

I was delighted, upon retrieving it, to find it was from Men-Tsee-Khang, which is the Astrology Department of the Tibetan Government-In-Exile. While in Dharamsala, for entertainment value more than anything else I went ahead and got my Tibetan horoscope processed to see what kind of news it offered me.

The page begins with an invocation and homage to Lord Kalanchakra, whomever that might be, and gors on to tell me the following:

• I was born on the 11th day of the first month of the Wood-Tiger according to the Tibetan Lunar Calendar (similar to the Chinese calendar, in which I am a tiger as well).
• The weekday of my birth renders me compassionate but a bit vacillating in nature, especially to do with social affairs.
• The constellations of my birth render me short-tempered “yet… kind hearted in true color”. When I was a kid I rather loved to do “sinful deeds” and need to watch that tendency in the future. I also love to go out in my free time.
• I have a well outlook and physique (ha ha ha).
• My lucky color is blue.
• This life looks like a lucky one, but ages 13, 18, 25, 30, 37, 49, 50, 54, 60, 61, and 65 are supposed to be my most difficult years (especially in terms of health and personal problems). Of course, I’m 30 and having one of my best years yet… but it is only April so far.
• I should be nice to animals to appease the God.
• My strengths, according to elemental astrology: I am brave and daring, and a very clean person who likes to make friends. I should be wealthy and prosperous in this life (how, I don’t know, but anyway), and I am a diligent and honest person. I’m frank as well as friendly, and converse well. I’m usually smart and talented and have a big heart. I love to travel, and in childhood I loved having a pet.
• My weaknesses, according to elemental astrology: I’m very self-centered and somewhat prideful. I should watch out for these tendencies.
• I have no past lives. I came directly from heaven.
• I am likely to be born as a woman in my next life, unless I am careful. If I keep a tanka in my home or revere the Buddha, and act nicely in life, I may manage to be reborn as a perfect human being in my next life.
• I should live until about age 66.
• I will face five major obstacles in my life; to combat them, the astrologers recommend I do the following: give alms to the poor; save poor and dying animals and love them with all my heart; do humanitarian work; cultivate my generosity.
• Thursday is my life-soul day, and Saturday is my life-force day, and so these are my best days for getting stuff done. Friday is my “foe” day, meaning my worst day, and I should never do business on a Friday. Huh, that fits with my work schedule, anyway.

All in all, fascinating, but of course I don’t give any credit to any of it as more than interesting and amusing.