When you’re young, every small failure makes you feel as if you have been struck down. If you have fallen off your bicycle into the mud, you look around to see if anyone saw it happen. If you tripped on your own shoelace, your face goes red. If your failings are deeper than that as a child, heaven help you: you’re still glancing around months later to see if anyone is looking at you in the way you think you recognize, the way you fear because it makes you feel so incredibly small and awful. When you get older, you …